ILUMINACAO

It feels I have waited a lifetime for this.

29th October 2008

All of my days I have read about accomplishing a higher awareness of life, described my many pieces of literature, and philosophical texts. I guess that all of this time I have been wondering where ends meet, the tie of all aspects of personality.

The funny thing is reaching the essence of character, the Self core. I guess most people realize someday that they are not their personal circumstances or life history. Most people, consciously or unconsciously search their personal selves by an array of exercises of character, these might be personal goals, hobbies and objectives, all reflecting different sides of the inherent personality of the searcher, and the very antithesis of this lifelong exercise becomes the product of the activities, very ironically.

Hobbies can often become personal tragedies, consume the very life force of the hobbyist, very simply this happens due to imbalance (spent your life savings buying stuff you ended up having enough of?), the fact is that the ends rarely meet, this is, the vast amount of thoughts, reflections, hobbies and activities rarely reach a conclusion, or any sort of positive productivity, and becomes a poisonous nourishment that acts the function of escaping reality, the feared personal inner world based on emotions.

Basically, these exercises of personality in the material world, become a form of escapism from the hurtful emotional inner and willing reality. It never mirrors reality or life potential.


This is to say that I have reached a particular and blissful state of mind, that I wont explain in proper depth to any non participant spectators of this blog, there is really no point in it, I am simply writing this as a record, which is what this blog really is.

A scrap book,and amalgamation of design and art guidelines.

This just to say that: IT EXISTS, happened to me yesterday.

BRAND "GURU"

University, enterprise, logic and how sometimes hate to be a mastermind.


It was in 2003 sometime, at DeMonfort University, Graphic Design course, I still remember that Mars bar I hate in the car before
the very first hour of the beginning of my course, I still remember my thoughts at the time, having sold my beautiful Jaguar and
purchased a no less luxurious but far less powerful sports hatchback. With this in my mind, finishing my Mars bar
and wondering if there was time for a coffee to clear my throat before the introduction at the auditory, I thought about the most expensive
car I have ever had, wondered if he was being treated right by the new owner, and somehow felt apologetic for letting him go. I actually
said it loud:

Espero que isto valha a pena, desculpa-me. Onde quer que estejas, espero que estejas bem.

With no option for a real expresso, I took with me my cup of coffee, a sort of "strong italian strain", and unlike school days, I sat just beside
everybody.

It began, for the last few years I would experience some of the most challenging and idilic moment of my life, I have known and took heed of design
industry secrets from the best of the best in Britain's design world, through the course and networking.

In the next few days I have done a personality test by an American university, and the shock followed, result: Mastermind. I somehow knew I was in for
very testing times.

I can still visualize the landscape from the studios window in a rainy day, I remember that then my hopes were high, maybe this mastermind thing was nothing...
Nothing is simple for those who want everything- Looking back I can see how everything was simple, but while on the spot, under the common huge pressures of those
who either defy fate, or whose fate defies, everything seemed an impossibility.

It was more or less at this stage I have verified some very deep parallels between life and art, I was however moving very fiercely to the next stage, to master the
the very craft that killed traditional/primary arts: full cored technology.

It was very fast for me to learn skills that others have spent a lifetime learning, I amazed myself on how quickly I have took on so many complicated subjects.

This to say that technology effectively killed art, just as Flash and actionscriping killed both standard graphics and logic, way to go Flash the true graphic rebel...

That was so to speak part of it, you see, even technology somehow went astray from logic, its now too vast and unrelated,with no visible bridges- evolution simply become
commercial competition.

Commercial competition and the wish of doing even better, there came the ultimate tool- Sublimis. Yes it was back then this started for real, and university become the basis
to distinguish the member of this versatile program. My studies on this have not been published yet, but I can say here (who the fuck reads this anyway) that subliminal Tech was
the inspiration to make this program that so quickly explores the communication potential of any image. I never believed in subliminal technology, I thought it was unfair and
manipulative, but I explored it anyway, as sometimes we have to know the enemy to create a hero.

I guess I have found something better and with the help of keen contributors, developed it even faster, being at the same time its only keeper (the developers only develop pieces,
I put them together, and have the core combination... clever? keep reading)

So, somehow there were leaks, and very keen brand names wanted to see it-buy it/use it. I have only allowed myself to see it, and worked with it, having had quite a few briefs on
it, I have had to keep them confidential, and developed my consultancy on these terms, special brand consultancy with the promise of confidentiality.

I might have made the greatest breakthrough in the development of graphic design, and yet- zero recognition, as I have made confidentiality my promise of service.

These pages are the record of my private frustration, I have not seek fame, but being recognized at university international level would have been all I have dreamed of in teenage days.

When I was a kid I wanted to be a scientist, I have done so, and perhaps created my own science, its too much for one single man, and months ago, I downed the Sublimis and Sublimis Network sites of the air,shortly after OCR capabilities have been built in the software.

This software can never become commercial, its far too effective, untested and fakes would invade the market, written by competitors looking for the easy buck.

This software revolutionized graphic design in my own and other specialist views, we were marvelled and scared at the same time, and not knowing what to do, I have paused it-OK, maybe ended it.

My name is now recognized in private design and marketing circles, I get the briefs, refuse them, and nobody gives up. The design secret weapon man thing first looked good, feels like a curse now, sometimes I wish I just kept painting, and stayed away from university

I wanted to explore the beauty of advertisement campaigns, graphic and beautiful design. Have instead been recognized in evaluating shades and colour frequency suggestion.

Logic killed my art.